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Where Am I ?

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    Posted: Aug 31 2020 at 4:11am
 
Thank you Geno. Heart 
His name was the Crossroads from Dark Water.
Upon his birth, his world became my world.
He was harassed.  He was treated badly and unfairly.
His trials impacted everyone who knew us.
The self-righteous took him down.  
In 2009, he paid with his last breath.
He would have been 42 today.

We are at that crossroads.
The waters are dark.
My voice will not be silenced.



I love you Travis.
Forever, Broken Heart
Mom

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 29 2020 at 5:23pm
Remembering Travis on his Birthday

Mixey, and as You asked...


"Dear Travis...
Do I speak?  Do I write?  Do I keep quiet?" 

I have pondered the same thing. The world is way out, way past crazy, with extremely hard boiled, angry, opposing views plus... no compromise or mutual understanding between opposite sides... anywhere in sight. 

 Who knows what is best to do... especially in this horrible year of ...2020. 

 Anyway, Travis, remembering your life on this planet. 
Heart Rest in Peace 


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 31 2020 at 3:15pm
Dear Travis...
Do I speak?  Do I write?  Do I keep quiet?

There are protests and riots going on all over this country.  Racial unrest has escalated.  The pot is being more than stirred by tweets from you know who.

In the town where we lived, the locals on Nextdoor are arguing about the same old stupid stuff. If I give them all an earful of what happened to you, what happened to us at the hands of cops and our greedy, racist, criminal neighbors... if I give a voice to you, will it matter, or will they just trash you some more?  

What should I do my son?  Should I write?  Should I speak?  Should I shut up?
I miss you so much Travis!  💔
Love always,
Mom
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2020 at 1:52pm
 Thank you for that beautiful post above Geno!

Today, March 31st, 2020, marks 11 years since my beautiful boy passed.  I’ll forever be heartbroken.  All week I’ve listened to music and gone through your journals my son.  You were miles ahead of me, in knowing.  You read people’s intentions so well that when you responded to those instead of the actions that might have been, people didn’t understand you.  You were miles ahead.  That’s why you loved animals so much.  You were a child who was instep with nature.  Animals loved you and you loved them.  I wish the world, especially now was more like you.  You weren’t greedy.  You wanted to share with everyone, even the ones with bad intentions.  You knew we are all one, even with the bad ones.

I miss you so much!
Always my love to you Travis,
Mom XO
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 30 2019 at 9:44pm
 
Remembering 
the Memories of Travis today in 2019,
as it nears his birthday.

                                                                      
Mixey, Much Love To You, Geno



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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2019 at 9:49pm
Dear Travis,
Today marks 10 years since you walked this earth as we once knew. I had breakfast in an almost empty restaurant, which was situated out beyond the newly barricaded streets of this absurdly gorgeous and still narrow minded town. As I ate, I watched the huge crowd of locals in the distance, walking and running on the ocean bluffs, multigenerations, some seriously completing, some with dogs in tow. This was the walk/run that you and your grandmother and I used to enjoy. Your grandmother even won in her age group. Remember? I didn’t know it had been scheduled for today. I just decided to eat out after stopping in at Smart and Final for some home supplies. Home? That’s another part of this cruel joke. Pretty soon I will be moving away from the ground where you and your grandmother and I called home. It was hard not to cry into my coffee.
I love you and miss you so much my son! 💔
Mom XO
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 06 2018 at 4:08am
Dear Son,
It's been 9 years without you now. On March 31st I bought a pizza... from the place we used to go down the street from the warehouse. As I ate, I cried myself into a sinus headache. It doesn't get any easier as time passes. Even the moon was blue.
I miss you so much.
Love always and forever.
Mom XO
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 29 2017 at 11:31pm
Geno,
Thank you so much my friend. In the middle of going through so much family responsibility in your own world, you still took time to remember my sweet Travis. It doesn't get easier year after year. Every time I see a baby or interact with a nice young man, my heart cries. Travis would have been 38 this year. I joined a grief group, because after losing Mom and missing her so much, it's like I just lost my son too all over again. David Kessler is very helpful to those of us who are grieving. It helps to remember that all of us on this planet are in it together in this regard. Travis I love you my son.
XO as always and forever,
Mom
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 29 2017 at 10:44am
Mixey, 
 Remembering Travis as his memory lives on,
 and thinking of You, 
 and that his birthday is in just a few days...
Sending positive thoughts and much love...

Travis, Rest in Peace
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2017 at 11:28pm
OMG Geno!!!!  THANK YOU!
Thank you for calling again. Really nice talking to you tonight, playing music and having fun.
Love you!  XO
Mixey
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2017 at 9:27pm
Hi Mixey.

Yes, I have been thinking about Travis all week,
and especially today... 
it is still hard to imagine that he is gone...  
Travis, Rest In Peace, where ever You are, right now,
and Mar, MuchLove To You in The Memory of Your Son ~ Geno






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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2017 at 9:07pm
Dear Geno,
I just heard your phone message.  Thank you for thinking about me and Travis.  It's late for you on the East coast, and you sounded spent 3 hours ago, so let's catch up later.  Both you and I are overloaded.  
We both need a good night sleep. Sleepy
Love you, Hug
Mixey           
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2017 at 1:02pm
Dear Son,

I'm sitting here in the little house crying because I miss you.  It's 8 years today that you've transitioned to somewhere. Cry

I love you Travis. Broken Heart
As always,
Mom
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 31 2016 at 10:28pm
Dear Travis,

You would have been 38 today, this Aug 31st, 2016.  Even though you left this earth when you were 30, I still cry when I see a baby, or hear a touching story of a child on TV.  I see your footprints everywhere.

Cry I miss you so much.  I hope you're in a safe and loving place.  I love you forever.

Mom
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2016 at 6:35am
My dear son Travis,

I see you and I hear you and I feel you as though you haven't left, and yet I cry so much for my loss of you, and because you deserved so much more from this life.  

On this day 3/31/2016... it is 7 years since your passing.
Sometimes I wish I could know for sure that you are in a loving place, and that you have full knowledge of how happy and unhappy, insane and ridiculous, silly yet necessary the planet earth experience was and is for all of us. Sometimes I'm OK with not knowing anything. I'm never OK with wishing I could have been a better mother.

I love you forever Trav.
Mom HeartCryBroken HeartYing YangHugThumbs UpStarSmileClownLOLClapCryHug

Geno... Thank you for your friendship and kindness over these difficult years; and thank you for your words above for Mom.  On the 22nd, it was 6 months since Mom's passing.  My head is still in a whirl, and I don't know what I'm doing half of the time.  You understand on a very personal level; and I send love and respect to you and your family every day.

Mike and Susan... Thank you for your love and continuing emotional support.  Thank you for being here for me and for everything else that would take 1000 hours to write, or v-mail. 

Mixey

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Sep 22 2015 at 5:16am
Mixey,

Mar, 
At this very moment, there are simply few words
more precious, or more comforting to remember
then these words...

She is now in a better place.
 
Mar, You have been a wonderful daughter, a close friend and a terrific, 
caring partner to Your Mom, over all of these years, 
through the good times and throughout all of her suffering, 
and I am so very, very sorry to hear of Your loss in the passing of Your Mom. 

Remember to focus on those good times, those many moments filled with love, 
laughter and the fun that You and Your Mom shared each and every day. 

As difficult as it is to write and read these words right now with respect to Your Mom... 
Her suffering has now ended, and She is now in a better place.  
May She Rest in Eternal Peace.

With Love and Respect to You, Mar,
~Geno



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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 31 2015 at 3:37pm
Mixey,
Remembering that today is Travis' Birthday.
and so I am sending positive thoughts of His memory
out into the Universe.
Much Love To You & Your Mom on this day. 
~Geno 


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 31 2014 at 9:59pm
Mixey,
As You know from our conversation earlier today,
'been thinking about Trav, and You, and Your Mom 
all weekend ... remembering 
that today would be Trav's 36th Birirthday.

I was wondering about Travis's shoes up on the roof...
Good to know that they are still up there at Crest, 
keeping watch for those beautiful sunsets.






Mixey, Much Love To You, Your Mom,
and To The Memory of Travis,
~Gene

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote M I X E Y Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Aug 31 2014 at 1:59pm
My son's shoes are on my roof and he's not in them.  They're now a home for leaves and spiders and whatnot, giving the birds something to investigate as they fly overhead.  I feel more comfortable knowing his shoes are still up there.

My son would have loved to have watched our big puppies playing in the yard.  He would have added his brilliant replays to the mix, and their spit, dirt and volume would have gotten tangled in his hair.  

There will be another red orange sunset tonight followed by mournful howling at the moon, as an intrusive helicopter circles. 

I miss you terribly Travis especially on this, your 36th birthday.

Love always,
Mom
XO

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gene_Leone_Mix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Mar 31 2014 at 8:54pm
Mixey... I am so very glad 
to be working coast to coast 
with You 
on this very day, today
March 31st, 2014
on a very special project
in memory of a very special person
who is very very much
still right here with us in spirit.
Travis, Rest In Peace. 

Mixey, As Always, MuchLove To You, to Your Mom, and to The Memory of Travis
~Geno

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